1 00:00:00,000 –> 00:00:07,980 Now, when a person comes to Jesus Christ in repentance and faith, God makes everything 2 00:00:07,980 –> 00:00:09,200 new. 3 00:00:09,200 –> 00:00:14,600 You become a Christian through a new birth, and that new birth we’ve seen is the beginning 4 00:00:14,600 –> 00:00:16,600 of a whole new life. 5 00:00:16,600 –> 00:00:19,680 The new life brings to us the privilege of a new ministry. 6 00:00:19,680 –> 00:00:24,219 God makes us priests who offer worship and service. 7 00:00:24,219 –> 00:00:28,320 We become a temple in which his presence is known. 8 00:00:28,340 –> 00:00:31,900 And then we saw that in this ministry we have a great purpose. 9 00:00:31,900 –> 00:00:36,500 And we identified it from 1 Peter chapter 2 and verse 12. 10 00:00:36,500 –> 00:00:42,480 The objective that we should live in such a way that people who are deeply resistant 11 00:00:42,480 –> 00:00:47,060 to the good news of Jesus Christ, will come to glorify God. 12 00:00:47,060 –> 00:00:51,980 Now, having established that objective from 1 Peter chapter 2 and verse 12, the question 13 00:00:51,980 –> 00:00:54,299 is, how are we to pursue it? 14 00:00:54,320 –> 00:00:59,900 How is this great objective, that God has given to Christian believers in this world, 15 00:00:59,900 –> 00:01:01,740 to be fulfilled? 16 00:01:01,740 –> 00:01:05,779 And last time we saw Peter’s first answer to that question. 17 00:01:05,779 –> 00:01:13,480 Christian believers in any situation of conflict must seek to speak and to act redemptively. 18 00:01:13,480 –> 00:01:19,160 In other words, in a situation of difficulty, the primary question that I’m to ask is, 19 00:01:19,160 –> 00:01:25,739 what can I say or do that will bring healing in this situation? 20 00:01:25,739 –> 00:01:32,080 Sometimes that may mean that there needs to be direct and open confrontation. 21 00:01:32,080 –> 00:01:37,500 Sometimes it may mean that there should be quiet and private forgiveness. 22 00:01:37,500 –> 00:01:43,300 Either way, it is always painful, it is always difficult, but where there is conflict, instead 23 00:01:43,320 –> 00:01:50,160 of saying how can I get my way, how can I win, Christ has called us to a different path. 24 00:01:50,160 –> 00:01:56,199 We saw it set out at the end of 1 Peter 2, when he suffered, he did not retaliate, he 25 00:01:56,199 –> 00:02:01,660 didn’t make threats, he trusted himself to God who judges justly. 26 00:02:01,660 –> 00:02:08,720 He bore our sin in his body on the tree and it’s by his wounds that we are healed. 27 00:02:08,720 –> 00:02:12,300 Christ acted redemptively. 28 00:02:12,300 –> 00:02:19,559 He brought healing through his wounds and Peter says in verse 21 that in this, Christ 29 00:02:19,559 –> 00:02:25,559 has left an example for every one of us who follow him that we also may be the agents 30 00:02:25,559 –> 00:02:30,199 of bringing his healing and his grace into a broken world. 31 00:02:30,199 –> 00:02:35,860 So, how is it then that people who are highly resistant to Jesus Christ will come to glorify 32 00:02:36,600 –> 00:02:44,100 Peter’s first answer as we his people follow the example of Jesus and seek to bring healing 33 00:02:44,100 –> 00:02:47,720 into a broken and a conflicted world? 34 00:02:47,720 –> 00:02:55,000 Now today we come to the fifth key for the Christian life and Peter has more to say about 35 00:02:55,000 –> 00:03:01,460 how we are to pursue this great objective, and we’re going to cover the first 12 verses 36 00:03:01,539 –> 00:03:08,139 of chapter 3 the first seven that we read last time and 8 to 12 that was read just now. 37 00:03:08,139 –> 00:03:15,779 Peter gives instruction to wives and to husbands about how we’re to share married life together 38 00:03:15,779 –> 00:03:22,339 but before we get into that I want you to notice the reason that he gives for this teaching. 39 00:03:22,339 –> 00:03:24,360 It comes in verse 7 40 00:03:32,220 –> 00:03:35,300 Why, why are we to do this? 41 00:03:35,300 –> 00:03:44,779 Answer, verse 7, so that nothing will hinder your prayers. 42 00:03:44,779 –> 00:03:49,059 Then look at verse 12 and you’ll see that he raises the same theme again. 43 00:03:49,059 –> 00:03:52,339 The eyes of the Lord are on, who? 44 00:03:52,339 –> 00:04:00,059 The righteous and his ears are attentive to their prayers. 45 00:04:00,059 –> 00:04:06,880 So he’s talking about how we must live in the home and in the church if we want to have 46 00:04:06,880 –> 00:04:09,360 an effective ministry of prayer. 47 00:04:09,360 –> 00:04:15,940 And of course, if God does not hear our prayers, what hope is there that highly resistant people 48 00:04:15,940 –> 00:04:18,640 will ever come to glorify him? 49 00:04:18,640 –> 00:04:24,160 So Peter is continuing on the same theme, critical to the pursuit of our great God-given 50 00:04:24,160 –> 00:04:29,399 objective in this world is the way that we live at home, the way in which we relate together 51 00:04:29,399 –> 00:04:36,480 within the body of Christ at church, because that, in turn, is critical to the effectiveness 52 00:04:36,480 –> 00:04:39,000 of our prayer. 53 00:04:39,000 –> 00:04:43,799 Now there’s a marvelous story in the Old Testament that I think illustrates this point well. 54 00:04:43,799 –> 00:04:51,160 You know, the story of Jonah, the prophet through whom God spoke directly to his people. 55 00:04:51,160 –> 00:04:55,880 Jonah was God’s man in his generation. 56 00:04:55,959 –> 00:05:00,299 When Jonah spoke, everybody listened. 57 00:05:00,299 –> 00:05:05,380 And through Jonah’s ministry, lives were changed. 58 00:05:05,380 –> 00:05:11,179 But then you remember the story of how God called Jonah to go to a new location of Nineveh, 59 00:05:11,179 –> 00:05:13,720 the City of Nineveh, and change is never easy. 60 00:05:13,720 –> 00:05:15,040 Jonah didn’t want to go. 61 00:05:15,040 –> 00:05:21,579 He got on a ship, he sailed in the opposite direction, and soon that ship sailed into 62 00:05:21,579 –> 00:05:24,059 a storm. 63 00:05:24,059 –> 00:05:29,679 When the ship was caught in the storm, the crew were in a state of panic. 64 00:05:29,679 –> 00:05:38,339 The captain went to Jonah and said, Jonah, get up and call on your God. 65 00:05:38,339 –> 00:05:47,839 Now, I think that this must be an entrant for the all-time world’s most embarrassing 66 00:05:47,839 –> 00:05:49,779 situation. 67 00:05:49,779 –> 00:05:54,380 You see, here are a group of pagan sailors. 68 00:05:54,380 –> 00:05:58,920 They know nothing about God, but they know that there’s one man on the ship who does 69 00:05:58,920 –> 00:06:02,119 know the God of heaven and earth. 70 00:06:02,119 –> 00:06:09,299 And in their desperation, these pagans come to a man who knows God, and they say, would 71 00:06:09,299 –> 00:06:12,140 you please pray for us? 72 00:06:12,140 –> 00:06:17,140 What a moment. 73 00:06:17,140 –> 00:06:23,059 The pagans are asking for prayer and Jonah has the opportunity to intercede. 74 00:06:23,059 –> 00:06:28,079 And if God is to answer his prayer and to calm the storm, then these pagans will surely 75 00:06:28,079 –> 00:06:31,859 come to glorify God. 76 00:06:31,859 –> 00:06:34,959 But Jonah can’t do it. 77 00:06:34,959 –> 00:06:41,640 He’s in the world’s all time most embarrassing situation of having to explain to these people 78 00:06:41,679 –> 00:06:48,119 that actually I’m sorry, I can’t pray for you with any effect because I’m running from 79 00:06:48,119 –> 00:06:49,119 God. 80 00:06:49,119 –> 00:06:53,940 There’s a fundamental unresolved disobedience in my life. 81 00:06:53,940 –> 00:06:56,600 And so this man is useless to God. 82 00:06:56,600 –> 00:06:59,239 He’s useless to these struggling sailors. 83 00:06:59,239 –> 00:07:02,880 There is nothing else to be done except to throw him overboard. 84 00:07:02,880 –> 00:07:07,720 And then when he is swallowed by a fish, he begins to repent. 85 00:07:08,480 –> 00:07:15,160 And when he repents, God listens to his prayer. 86 00:07:15,160 –> 00:07:21,279 Now, I cannot imagine anything more shameful, and I think that is the right word here, I 87 00:07:21,279 –> 00:07:31,320 cannot imagine anything more shameful, than to be a Christian and at some moment to be 88 00:07:31,320 –> 00:07:40,619 useless to an unbeliever in desperate need who asks you for help and for prayer. 89 00:07:40,619 –> 00:07:49,579 God has made us a kingdom of priests, but what in all the world is the use of a kingdom 90 00:07:49,579 –> 00:07:54,079 of priests, whose prayers are never heard? 91 00:07:54,880 –> 00:08:01,359 Well, there are many people who are deeply convinced that God hears any prayer offered 92 00:08:01,359 –> 00:08:06,299 by any person at any time in any circumstance, and I think therefore that it is very important 93 00:08:06,299 –> 00:08:13,200 for us to understand clearly that that is simply not the case. 94 00:08:13,339 –> 00:08:18,160 The Bible makes it very clear to us that there are circumstances in which God chooses not 95 00:08:18,160 –> 00:08:24,239 to hear prayer, and I want us to notice a principle from the Bible that may very well 96 00:08:24,239 –> 00:08:30,279 be one of the most neglected truths in all of the scripture. 97 00:08:30,279 –> 00:08:39,679 The principle is simply this, that there is no effective praying without right living. 98 00:08:39,679 –> 00:08:47,640 There is no effective praying without right living. 99 00:08:47,700 –> 00:08:52,260 God teaches us, of course, in pictures and in the Old Testament, the earliest picture 100 00:08:52,260 –> 00:08:59,520 of this principle was that the priests had to wash their hands before they engaged in 101 00:08:59,520 –> 00:09:06,919 their ministry and David takes up that picture in Psalm 24 and verse 3 where he asks this 102 00:09:06,919 –> 00:09:14,760 question, who may ascend the hill of the Lord, who may stand in God’s holy presence, a great 103 00:09:14,760 –> 00:09:16,739 picture of prayer and of worship. 104 00:09:16,820 –> 00:09:18,500 Who can do this? 105 00:09:18,500 –> 00:09:24,919 Answer, He who has clean hands and a pure heart. 106 00:09:24,919 –> 00:09:28,659 He will receive blessing from the Lord. 107 00:09:29,919 –> 00:09:36,260 David takes up the same theme again in Psalm 66 and verse 16, come and listen all you who 108 00:09:36,260 –> 00:09:37,260 fear the Lord. 109 00:09:37,260 –> 00:09:40,659 He says, let me tell you what the Lord has done for me and then he speaks about prayer, 110 00:09:40,659 –> 00:09:42,679 I cried out to the Lord. 111 00:09:42,679 –> 00:09:51,659 He says, if I had cherished sin in my heart, he would not have heard me. 112 00:09:51,659 –> 00:09:56,960 But God did listen, he says, and heard my voice in pray. 113 00:09:56,960 –> 00:10:01,840 Now, notice that David is not saying that you have to be perfect before God will hear 114 00:10:01,840 –> 00:10:02,840 your prayer. 115 00:10:02,840 –> 00:10:06,020 Obviously, if that was the case that God would never hear any of our prayers. 116 00:10:06,500 –> 00:10:10,979 God listens to the prayers of sinners. 117 00:10:10,979 –> 00:10:14,900 But what David is making clear here, and the whole Scripture makes it very plain, that 118 00:10:14,900 –> 00:10:22,119 God does not listen to one who cherishes his sin or her sin. 119 00:10:22,119 –> 00:10:23,359 One who holds on to it. 120 00:10:23,359 –> 00:10:29,299 One who says, this is something that I accommodate in my life, and I will not address, and I 121 00:10:29,299 –> 00:10:30,799 will not let go. 122 00:10:31,359 –> 00:10:39,840 If I did that, David said, if I cherished my sin, God would not have heard my prayer. 123 00:10:39,840 –> 00:10:43,299 You find the same teaching in the prophet Isaiah. 124 00:10:43,299 –> 00:10:48,179 God called him to minister at a time when there were marvelous crowds gathering for 125 00:10:48,179 –> 00:10:50,239 worship in the temple. 126 00:10:50,239 –> 00:10:52,820 Spirituality had never been more popular. 127 00:10:52,820 –> 00:10:59,039 They were great festivals of praise and of worship, more sacrifices were being offered 128 00:10:59,099 –> 00:11:03,880 in the early days of Isaiah’s ministry than at any other time in history, and this is 129 00:11:03,880 –> 00:11:05,719 what God said about it. 130 00:11:05,719 –> 00:11:07,219 Isaiah 1.15. 131 00:11:07,219 –> 00:11:11,479 Your festivals have become a burden to me. 132 00:11:11,479 –> 00:11:18,479 When you spread out your hands in prayer, I will hide my eyes from you. 133 00:11:19,200 –> 00:11:26,200 Even if you offer many prayers, I will not listen. 134 00:11:26,640 –> 00:11:30,299 Wash and make yourselves clean. 135 00:11:30,299 –> 00:11:34,760 Stop doing wrong, learn to do right. 136 00:11:34,760 –> 00:11:37,080 See the principles very clear. 137 00:11:37,080 –> 00:11:42,539 No effective praying without right living. 138 00:11:42,539 –> 00:11:45,979 Jesus made this very clear in his teaching in the Sermon on the Mount. 139 00:11:45,979 –> 00:11:47,719 You remember speaking about worship. 140 00:11:47,719 –> 00:11:52,559 He said if you come to offer your gift at the alter, and then you remember that your 141 00:11:52,619 –> 00:11:58,039 brother has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar and first 142 00:11:58,039 –> 00:12:03,000 go and be reconciled to your brother, and then come and offer your gift. 143 00:12:03,000 –> 00:12:08,400 There’s going to be no authentic worship, no effective prayer without doing what is 144 00:12:08,400 –> 00:12:09,400 right. 145 00:12:09,400 –> 00:12:14,760 And that, of course, is why James, in the most succinct expression of this principle 146 00:12:14,760 –> 00:12:22,320 in all of the Bible says, the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. 147 00:12:22,320 –> 00:12:24,500 That’s James 5, 16. 148 00:12:24,500 –> 00:12:28,200 The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. 149 00:12:28,200 –> 00:12:32,039 A man, a woman who does what is right. 150 00:12:32,039 –> 00:12:39,460 You can’t separate right living from effective praying. 151 00:12:39,460 –> 00:12:43,799 Now, you see that that is the principle that runs all the way through the Bible, and Peter 152 00:12:43,799 –> 00:12:47,840 takes it up here in 1 Peter in chapter 3. 153 00:12:47,979 –> 00:12:56,299 Now, husbands, here is how you are to relate to your wives, so that nothing will hinder 154 00:12:56,299 –> 00:12:59,359 your prayers. 155 00:12:59,359 –> 00:13:04,380 You’re not treating your wife right at home, don’t think that God is going to pay any 156 00:13:04,380 –> 00:13:09,340 attention to your attempts at ministry. 157 00:13:09,340 –> 00:13:11,960 That’s the principle. 158 00:13:12,900 –> 00:13:18,500 Now, I get frustrated with the adverts on television. 159 00:13:18,500 –> 00:13:20,780 Am I alone in this? 160 00:13:20,780 –> 00:13:25,320 When we’re watching television and the adverts come on, we’ve developed a habit we press 161 00:13:25,320 –> 00:13:31,280 the mute button and go and make a cup of coffee or something like that. 162 00:13:31,280 –> 00:13:33,859 Now think of it this way. 163 00:13:33,859 –> 00:13:41,820 If God sees me acting in a way that is unkind and inappropriate towards people he has placed 164 00:13:41,820 –> 00:13:42,840 next to me. 165 00:13:42,840 –> 00:13:45,039 Do you know what he does? 166 00:13:45,039 –> 00:13:50,479 He presses the mute button on my prayers. 167 00:13:50,479 –> 00:13:58,580 And you know, think about it, when God says I will not listen, that means that it would 168 00:13:58,580 –> 00:14:04,460 be possible to spend an hour in prayer, a day in retreat, a morning in Bible study, 169 00:14:04,460 –> 00:14:08,719 and to achieve absolutely nothing of spiritual value. 170 00:14:09,039 –> 00:14:15,760 See, one of the greatest dangers we face as Christians is a false spirituality that separates 171 00:14:15,760 –> 00:14:21,000 our relationship with God from our relationships with other people, so that we begin to think 172 00:14:21,000 –> 00:14:26,520 that spirituality is about prayer, and Bible study, and worship, and being in a small group. 173 00:14:26,520 –> 00:14:29,400 Well, all of these things are good. 174 00:14:29,400 –> 00:14:36,020 But none of them will do you or me any good if God has pressed the mute button on our 175 00:14:36,020 –> 00:14:38,000 prayers. 176 00:14:39,080 –> 00:14:44,419 God will never allow us to separate our relationship with him from our relationships with other 177 00:14:44,419 –> 00:14:46,659 people in the way that we treat them. 178 00:14:46,659 –> 00:14:52,299 Your relationship with God affects the way that you treat other people, and the way that 179 00:14:52,299 –> 00:14:57,280 you treat other people affects your relationship with God. 180 00:14:57,280 –> 00:15:04,960 So, if I am to keep this big objective in view, to live in such a way that highly resistant 181 00:15:05,020 –> 00:15:11,960 people will come to glorify God, then I need to act redemptively, but I also need to pray 182 00:15:12,080 –> 00:15:20,880 effectively, and if I am to pray effectively, I need to make sure that nothing hinders my 183 00:15:20,900 –> 00:15:21,900 prayers. 184 00:15:21,900 –> 00:15:26,919 Do you see how that’s a fundamental principle for Christian living, for every church and 185 00:15:26,919 –> 00:15:28,359 for every home? 186 00:15:28,359 –> 00:15:34,159 Now, if the principle is clear, we can move on to the application. 187 00:15:34,159 –> 00:15:37,099 And I want to spend the rest of our time there. 188 00:15:37,099 –> 00:15:45,059 Notice that Peter spells out what this principle means in practice, first for wives, that’s 189 00:15:45,099 –> 00:15:54,340 verses 1 to 6, then for husbands, verse 7, and then for all of us in verse 8 through 12. 190 00:15:55,500 –> 00:16:02,200 Now just before we get into the word to wives and to husbands, it’s important to say 191 00:16:02,340 –> 00:16:10,419 that Peter is not suggesting that you have to be happily married if you’re going to be 192 00:16:10,419 –> 00:16:12,299 greatly used by God. 193 00:16:12,299 –> 00:16:19,520 In fact, some of the people who have been most remarkably used by God throughout history 194 00:16:19,520 –> 00:16:23,179 have endured terrible marriages. 195 00:16:23,179 –> 00:16:25,700 John Wesley would be one example of that. 196 00:16:25,700 –> 00:16:33,900 His marriage was an absolute disaster right from the beginning and it never improved. 197 00:16:33,900 –> 00:16:40,000 But God used John Wesley to bring revival to a whole nation in the eighteenth century. 198 00:16:40,000 –> 00:16:44,739 Now, I say that by way of encouragement. 199 00:16:44,739 –> 00:16:51,520 God calls us to do everything that we can in every situation. 200 00:16:51,520 –> 00:16:57,780 God does not hold us responsible for the attitudes and actions of another person. 201 00:16:57,780 –> 00:17:03,580 He does hold us responsible for our own attitudes and for our own actions, and that holds true 202 00:17:03,580 –> 00:17:11,099 both in situations that are easy and also in situations that are hard. 203 00:17:11,099 –> 00:17:14,819 So understanding that, let’s come to his encouragement first to wives. 204 00:17:14,819 –> 00:17:18,099 And notice that Peter identifies two issues. 205 00:17:18,099 –> 00:17:22,819 The first is submission and the second is beauty. 206 00:17:22,819 –> 00:17:26,219 First submission, verse 1, and then 5 and 6. 207 00:17:26,219 –> 00:17:33,780 Wives, in the same way be submissive to your husbands. 208 00:17:33,780 –> 00:17:39,819 Now there is hardly a passage of Scripture that’s going to be more controversial in our 209 00:17:39,819 –> 00:17:45,540 culture than this one, and I say that simply so that you know that I know that, all right? 210 00:17:45,540 –> 00:17:48,699 I am in fact aware of this. 211 00:17:48,699 –> 00:17:55,719 But it seems to me for that reason, we need to be especially careful that we understand 212 00:17:55,719 –> 00:17:58,640 clearly and rightly what it is that God says to us. 213 00:17:58,640 –> 00:18:05,359 Because whatever it is that God truly says, that we’re committed as his people to do. 214 00:18:05,359 –> 00:18:09,599 Obviously the question that arises, as many Christian wives look at this, they say I see 215 00:18:09,599 –> 00:18:11,920 that principle. 216 00:18:11,920 –> 00:18:15,979 What is this actually going to look like in practice? 217 00:18:15,979 –> 00:18:20,880 And so I think it’s very significant, you see in verse 5 and 6, that Peter actually 218 00:18:20,880 –> 00:18:28,599 spells out in practice what this looks like by giving us a model. 219 00:18:28,599 –> 00:18:32,880 He speaks about the wives in ancient times who were submissive to their husbands like 220 00:18:33,660 –> 00:18:40,380 Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her master. 221 00:18:40,380 –> 00:18:44,959 Now I find this fascinating, God, of all the women in the Old Testament who could’ve been 222 00:18:44,959 –> 00:18:52,900 chosen, identifies Sarah as the model for Christian wives. 223 00:18:52,900 –> 00:18:56,260 I think that’s fascinating because of all the women in the Old Testament, Sarah was 224 00:18:56,260 –> 00:18:59,880 certainly no pushover! 225 00:18:59,900 –> 00:19:04,920 She was a strong-willed woman. 226 00:19:04,920 –> 00:19:10,199 And she knew how and when to draw a line. 227 00:19:10,199 –> 00:19:18,060 And yet, in loyal support to Abraham, she fulfilled an incredible ministry. 228 00:19:18,060 –> 00:19:21,199 Those who are deeply concerned about these questions might like to follow through in 229 00:19:21,199 –> 00:19:29,579 Genesis and chapter 21 where we are told of an incident where Sarah insisted that Hagar 230 00:19:29,640 –> 00:19:35,760 should be excluded from the household after Isaac was born. 231 00:19:35,760 –> 00:19:41,780 When Sarah said this, Abraham didn’t like it one little bit. 232 00:19:41,780 –> 00:19:45,319 But Sarah was right. 233 00:19:45,319 –> 00:19:52,439 And we know that Sarah was right because God told Abraham to do what she said. 234 00:19:52,439 –> 00:19:54,680 That’s Genesis 21 in verse 12. 235 00:19:54,680 –> 00:19:56,380 Check it out. 236 00:19:56,640 –> 00:20:07,540 Women who follow the example of Sarah, therefore, will not be giving unthinking, slavish obedience 237 00:20:07,540 –> 00:20:08,640 to their husbands. 238 00:20:08,640 –> 00:20:15,420 If you thought that’s what it meant, the example of Sarah makes clear that it’s not. 239 00:20:15,420 –> 00:20:22,060 God does not call you, as a Christian wife, to be a cheerleader when your husband is obviously 240 00:20:22,060 –> 00:20:23,939 moving in the wrong direction. 241 00:20:24,439 –> 00:20:28,339 There are times where your husband may need you to say, 242 00:20:28,339 –> 00:20:31,540 “…This is wrong!” 243 00:20:31,540 –> 00:20:35,160 Sarah did that. 244 00:20:35,160 –> 00:20:43,400 She was the voice of God to her husband, and there may be times when you have that ministry too. 245 00:20:43,420 –> 00:20:51,000 The important thing—and Peter makes this very clear—was that Sarah looked up to Abraham 246 00:20:51,079 –> 00:20:54,000 and treated him with great respect. 247 00:20:54,000 –> 00:20:56,119 She called him, master, we read here. 248 00:20:56,119 –> 00:20:59,280 The word Peter uses could be translated, Sir or Mister. 249 00:20:59,280 –> 00:21:02,719 Either way, I think it still sounds very strange to us today. 250 00:21:02,719 –> 00:21:09,439 But what it is telling us is that Sarah did not look down on Abraham. 251 00:21:09,439 –> 00:21:16,219 She didn’t roll her eyes and make him look or feel foolish. 252 00:21:16,560 –> 00:21:25,160 Instead she played a wonderful role in making him the great man of God that he became. 253 00:21:25,160 –> 00:21:29,619 And remember, those who struggle with the difficult marriage, it would be a great encouragement 254 00:21:29,619 –> 00:21:32,640 to you to do a study of the life of Sarah. 255 00:21:32,640 –> 00:21:36,099 I mean, can you imagine what it must have been like to be married to Abraham? 256 00:21:36,099 –> 00:21:41,800 You know the guy that comes home and says, oh, by the way, God has called us to move 257 00:21:41,800 –> 00:21:43,760 to another country today. 258 00:21:43,760 –> 00:21:45,660 We’ll be leaving tomorrow. 259 00:21:46,500 –> 00:21:48,180 Where is this other country? 260 00:21:48,180 –> 00:21:51,400 Well, I don’t actually know which country it’s going to be but we’ll find out as we 261 00:21:51,400 –> 00:21:52,400 go. 262 00:21:52,400 –> 00:21:53,839 I mean, can you imagine this? 263 00:21:53,839 –> 00:21:57,959 Boy did this woman have a difficult life. 264 00:21:57,959 –> 00:22:03,660 But you know, it was Sarah who gave birth to Isaac. 265 00:22:03,660 –> 00:22:08,660 And it was through Isaac and his line that Jesus Christ was born into the world. 266 00:22:08,660 –> 00:22:15,260 Sarah could never have imagined during her lifetime what God would do through her love 267 00:22:15,260 –> 00:22:22,339 and loyalty and faithfulness to a difficult and yet great man. 268 00:22:22,339 –> 00:22:27,479 But through this lady’s faithfulness to her husband in God’s chain of events, there will 269 00:22:27,479 –> 00:22:37,579 be a vast crowd of people who were once highly resistant who glorify God for all eternity. 270 00:22:37,579 –> 00:22:42,339 Secondly, Peter speaks about the issue of beauty, verses two to five. 271 00:22:42,339 –> 00:22:47,880 Now, he’s speaking to all wives here, but notice in verse two he draws particular attention 272 00:22:47,880 –> 00:22:54,060 to the situation of a Christian wife whose husband does not believe. 273 00:22:54,060 –> 00:22:58,380 And as we noted last time, Peter points out that the way in which a husband would be won 274 00:22:58,380 –> 00:23:04,020 over will not be by words but by behaviour. 275 00:23:04,020 –> 00:23:10,699 Warren Weirspey tells a delightful little anecdote of a lady, he says, who used to keep 276 00:23:10,699 –> 00:23:20,880 religious radio programs on at home all evening, usually very loud, so that her unsaved husband 277 00:23:20,880 –> 00:23:23,819 would hear the truth. 278 00:23:23,819 –> 00:23:30,459 Weirspey says, all she accomplished was to make it easier for him to leave home and spend 279 00:23:30,459 –> 00:23:32,579 the evenings with his friends. 280 00:23:32,579 –> 00:23:36,839 Now, that’s obviously the case, isn’t it? 281 00:23:36,839 –> 00:23:46,699 There is a very powerful principle here for all of us who are anxious to win a close relative. 282 00:23:46,699 –> 00:23:52,160 Now, the unique pressure of someone within your immediate family circle who is not a 283 00:23:52,160 –> 00:24:00,119 believer comes from the fact that within the family you have a captive audience, and that’s 284 00:24:00,119 –> 00:24:02,560 what makes it so pressurized. 285 00:24:02,699 –> 00:24:09,680 Relationships exist, they are not chosen, they’re there, and we need to be very careful 286 00:24:09,680 –> 00:24:16,540 that we do not abuse the privilege of a captive audience. 287 00:24:16,540 –> 00:24:23,680 You see, if you have a son, or a daughter, or a brother, a sister, a father, a mother 288 00:24:23,680 –> 00:24:30,839 who does not know the Lord, and they’re resistant… it’s so instinctive for us to become increasingly 289 00:24:30,839 –> 00:24:35,400 desperate about trying to win them for Jesus. 290 00:24:35,400 –> 00:24:42,560 And it’s a great mistake to take advantage of a captive audience. 291 00:24:42,560 –> 00:24:47,359 Peter has great practical wisdom for us here in all of these situations. 292 00:24:47,359 –> 00:24:53,680 What he says is point back on the words. 293 00:24:53,680 –> 00:24:56,520 Use them very sparingly. 294 00:24:57,520 –> 00:25:06,439 Your life over time will speak louder than any words. 295 00:25:06,439 –> 00:25:12,239 And then he goes on to speak about what’s this beautiful life looks like. 296 00:25:12,239 –> 00:25:19,699 In verse 3, your beauty, he says, should not come from outward adornment, such as braided 297 00:25:19,699 –> 00:25:24,420 hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. 298 00:25:24,520 –> 00:25:32,020 Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet 299 00:25:32,020 –> 00:25:33,020 spirit. 300 00:25:33,020 –> 00:25:42,079 Now, Peter is not placing an apostolic ban on certain hairstyles or on gold jewelry or 301 00:25:42,079 –> 00:25:44,359 on designer label clothes. 302 00:25:44,359 –> 00:25:46,060 Notice what he actually says. 303 00:25:46,060 –> 00:25:49,500 He is not saying you can’t wear them. 304 00:25:49,599 –> 00:25:55,040 He is saying your beauty shouldn’t depend on them. 305 00:25:55,040 –> 00:26:03,359 If your beauty depends on something you buy, you’re in big trouble. 306 00:26:03,359 –> 00:26:09,939 Now, we live in a culture where there is tremendous pressure on how we look. 307 00:26:09,939 –> 00:26:16,400 And let’s be honest, there are not many of us who look in the mirror in the morning and 308 00:26:16,400 –> 00:26:17,900 say, yes! 309 00:26:17,900 –> 00:26:25,939 We tend to look in the mirror in the morning and we say, oh, dear. 310 00:26:25,939 –> 00:26:29,180 Oh, dear. 311 00:26:29,180 –> 00:26:38,939 Now, in the Old Testament, the temple was overlaid with gold to make it a beautiful place 312 00:26:38,939 –> 00:26:41,920 for God to come. 313 00:26:41,920 –> 00:26:47,400 In the New Testament, Christian believers are the temple of the Holy Spirit, so the 314 00:26:47,400 –> 00:26:53,780 obvious question then is what will make our lives a beautiful place for God to come. 315 00:26:53,780 –> 00:26:59,699 And, Peter says it’s not going to be by overlaying yourself with gold. 316 00:26:59,699 –> 00:27:06,680 It’s going to be through the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. 317 00:27:06,680 –> 00:27:11,459 That will make your life beautiful for God. 318 00:27:11,579 –> 00:27:18,739 And over time, he says, God will use that to make a deep impression on your husband, 319 00:27:18,739 –> 00:27:24,459 on others around you as well. 320 00:27:24,459 –> 00:27:31,500 Your clothing, your hair, how we keep our appearance is of importance. 321 00:27:31,500 –> 00:27:38,459 It will attract the attention of your husband but that which is of greater importance is 322 00:27:38,459 –> 00:27:49,839 the beauty of your inner life, that will glorify God and it will speak louder than any words. 323 00:27:49,839 –> 00:27:54,520 Now, Peter now goes to encouragement for husbands. 324 00:27:54,520 –> 00:27:58,400 And again there are two themes that he draws out. 325 00:27:58,400 –> 00:28:01,300 The first is knowledge, verse seven. 326 00:28:01,300 –> 00:28:05,180 Now let me quote the New International Version first. 327 00:28:05,180 –> 00:28:11,780 Husbands in the same way, be considerate as you live with your wives, be considerate. 328 00:28:11,780 –> 00:28:19,619 Now the phrase that is translated be considerate there, literally means live with your wife 329 00:28:19,619 –> 00:28:22,060 according to knowledge. 330 00:28:22,060 –> 00:28:27,579 Now, this is such a helpful phrase that I’m giving the literal translation here because 331 00:28:27,579 –> 00:28:32,739 I find it very helpful and I think that you will find it helpful, too. 332 00:28:32,739 –> 00:28:38,500 Literally live with your wife according to knowledge. 333 00:28:38,500 –> 00:28:46,939 You see, there is nobody else in all the world like your wife. 334 00:28:46,939 –> 00:28:55,140 She is not like any other woman that God has ever made. 335 00:28:55,160 –> 00:29:01,939 Your job, job 1, is to know her. 336 00:29:01,939 –> 00:29:04,699 To understand her. 337 00:29:04,699 –> 00:29:09,459 To learn what makes her happy, and pursue it. 338 00:29:09,459 –> 00:29:14,140 To discover what hurts her and to avoid it. 339 00:29:14,140 –> 00:29:20,579 To understand her struggles, her fears, her hopes, her dreams. 340 00:29:20,579 –> 00:29:28,680 And then let that knowledge shape the way that you relate to her at home. 341 00:29:28,680 –> 00:29:38,780 Never, never let it be said that her friend or her counselor understands her better than 342 00:29:38,780 –> 00:29:40,020 you do. 343 00:29:40,020 –> 00:29:42,180 Never let that be said. 344 00:29:42,180 –> 00:29:49,219 And if that is the truth today, you work at getting to know her until you know her better 345 00:29:49,339 –> 00:29:55,579 than any other, for that is God’s calling to you. 346 00:29:55,579 –> 00:30:00,479 And it is a lifelong calling. 347 00:30:00,479 –> 00:30:03,959 Discover who she is today. 348 00:30:03,959 –> 00:30:08,020 I hear guys say sometimes, well of course she’s not the person I dated twenty years 349 00:30:08,020 –> 00:30:09,020 ago. 350 00:30:09,020 –> 00:30:11,380 Well, that really is stating the obvious, isn’t it? 351 00:30:11,380 –> 00:30:15,160 Of course she’s not the person you dated twenty years ago. 352 00:30:15,160 –> 00:30:18,420 She is who she is and who God is making her today. 353 00:30:18,420 –> 00:30:22,239 Discover what that is, discover what God is doing in her life now. 354 00:30:22,239 –> 00:30:28,239 Live with her according to knowledge, as you move through life together. 355 00:30:28,239 –> 00:30:35,180 It is an adventure, it is a journey, and it is the calling of God. 356 00:30:35,180 –> 00:30:40,060 That you listen to her, with your heart. 357 00:30:40,060 –> 00:30:47,260 And that as you know her that shapes the way that you live with her. 358 00:30:47,260 –> 00:30:50,579 Secondly, honor. 359 00:30:50,579 –> 00:30:51,719 Verse seven. 360 00:30:51,719 –> 00:30:55,079 Treat your wife with respect. 361 00:30:55,079 –> 00:30:57,939 The word Peter uses here, again, is better translated honor. 362 00:30:57,939 –> 00:30:59,979 It’s really stronger than respect. 363 00:30:59,979 –> 00:31:06,780 It means place her in the highest position. 364 00:31:06,819 –> 00:31:12,859 She has chosen to give herself to you. 365 00:31:12,859 –> 00:31:19,900 Make sure that you regard her as a sacred trust from God. 366 00:31:19,900 –> 00:31:25,339 Cherish your wife. 367 00:31:25,339 –> 00:31:27,979 Honor her with your time. 368 00:31:27,979 –> 00:31:33,020 Honor her with your money. 369 00:31:33,060 –> 00:31:40,199 Use your strength to support her, and to bless her. 370 00:31:40,199 –> 00:31:46,479 Speak to her in a way that makes her feel that she is honored. 371 00:31:46,479 –> 00:31:55,959 And speak about her to other people in a way that will exalt her in the eyes of others. 372 00:31:55,959 –> 00:32:03,000 And why husbands are we to do all these things? 373 00:32:03,000 –> 00:32:10,699 So that nothing will hinder your prayers. 374 00:32:10,699 –> 00:32:18,000 Now do you see, that is why the first qualification for leadership in the church is stability 375 00:32:18,000 –> 00:32:22,040 in the home, and in the family. 376 00:32:22,040 –> 00:32:29,040 Because wouldn’t it be a sad thing in any church if God did not listen to the prayers 377 00:32:29,040 –> 00:32:31,400 of its leaders? 378 00:32:31,400 –> 00:32:33,959 That would be a tragedy. 379 00:32:33,959 –> 00:32:38,260 That’s why the scripture makes it so plain that this is the first priority, because there 380 00:32:38,260 –> 00:32:43,979 is no effective praying, no effective ministry, no effective leadership without right living. 381 00:32:43,979 –> 00:32:49,479 God has joined these two things together. 382 00:32:49,479 –> 00:32:53,380 Changing the world begins at home. 383 00:32:53,380 –> 00:33:01,140 Living a life of love begins with those God has placed right next to you. 384 00:33:01,280 –> 00:33:05,819 That principle, so clear for husbands and for wives, is then extended out in Peter’s 385 00:33:05,819 –> 00:33:09,400 letter by way of encouragement for everyone. 386 00:33:09,400 –> 00:33:15,319 Because what begins in the home is to permeate the whole of the body of Christ, the church. 387 00:33:15,319 –> 00:33:16,739 Notice what he says, verse 8. 388 00:33:16,739 –> 00:33:18,239 Finally, all of you. 389 00:33:18,239 –> 00:33:24,319 He’s now embracing the singles, he’s embracing the widows, the widowers. 390 00:33:24,319 –> 00:33:30,560 He’s bringing together a whole family of God and he says now, what’s to be birthed in the 391 00:33:30,599 –> 00:33:33,780 home is to permeate the whole of the body of 392 00:33:33,780 –> 00:33:39,199 Christ, live in harmony with one another, be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate 393 00:33:39,199 –> 00:33:40,859 and humble. 394 00:33:40,859 –> 00:33:43,540 Verse 10, whoever would love life. 395 00:33:43,540 –> 00:33:46,640 Oh, there’s a great phrase. 396 00:33:46,640 –> 00:33:51,119 If you really want to live, here’s how we’re to do it. 397 00:33:51,119 –> 00:33:53,160 Keep your tongue from evil. 398 00:33:53,160 –> 00:33:56,500 Seek peace and pursue it. 399 00:33:56,500 –> 00:33:58,739 And when you do that, here’s what will happen. 400 00:33:58,739 –> 00:33:59,739 Verse 12. 401 00:34:00,339 –> 00:34:10,500 God’s eyes will be on you and His ears will be attentive to your prayers. 402 00:34:10,500 –> 00:34:20,800 A friend of mine who’s a pastor was chairing a church meeting that got rather ugly. 403 00:34:20,800 –> 00:34:27,820 I don’t know what the issue was, but people were divided, and they did not do a good job 404 00:34:27,919 –> 00:34:31,739 of expressing their differences kindly. 405 00:34:31,739 –> 00:34:36,139 Tempers between believers in the meeting got frayed. 406 00:34:36,139 –> 00:34:39,620 Words were spoken in anger. 407 00:34:39,620 –> 00:34:43,100 Hurts and wounds were inflicted. 408 00:34:43,100 –> 00:34:48,979 The pastor was not able to guide the meeting to agreement. 409 00:34:48,979 –> 00:34:52,800 Tension remained in the air. 410 00:34:52,800 –> 00:34:57,600 Somewhat defeated after the time for the meeting had elapsed, He said, 411 00:34:57,600 –> 00:35:02,000 Well, we need to adjourn now, and he turned to his assistant, 412 00:35:02,000 –> 00:35:05,020 And he said to the assistant minister, 413 00:35:05,020 –> 00:35:09,020 Would you like to lead us in a closing prayer? 414 00:35:09,020 –> 00:35:11,459 To which the assistant pastor said, 415 00:35:11,459 –> 00:35:20,000 You know I’m sorry, but I really wouldn’t like to lead in a closing prayer. 416 00:35:20,860 –> 00:35:24,320 I’m not altogether sure whether what he said was helpful, 417 00:35:24,320 –> 00:35:28,340 but I know why he said it. 418 00:35:28,340 –> 00:35:32,280 God’s family had been squabbling, 419 00:35:32,280 –> 00:35:35,159 and as long as antagonism remained, 420 00:35:35,159 –> 00:35:40,020 there was no point in pretending that God was listening to any prayers. 421 00:35:40,020 –> 00:35:42,459 Unless they were prayers to ask for forgiveness, 422 00:35:42,459 –> 00:35:43,979 and it was evident, from the state of the meeting, 423 00:35:43,979 –> 00:35:51,340 that people were not of that point of being ready to do so. 424 00:35:51,340 –> 00:35:53,659 Many of you know John Bunyan’s great book, 425 00:35:53,659 –> 00:35:55,899 The Pilgrim’s Progress. 426 00:35:55,899 –> 00:35:58,060 It pictures the Christian life as a journey 427 00:35:5,060 –> 00:36:00,500 in which a character by the name of Christian 428 00:36:00,500 –> 00:36:04,459 meets many others along the path that he travels. 429 00:36:04,459 –> 00:36:09,860 And one of these characters is entitled Mr. Talkative. 430 00:36:09,860 –> 00:36:12,899 And Bunyan has a brilliant little cameo 431 00:36:13,300 –> 00:36:15,179 of this character. 432 00:36:15,179 –> 00:36:18,100 And I want to just read it as we come to a close. 433 00:36:18,100 –> 00:36:23,340 Let me tell you what type of fellow Mr. Talkative is. 434 00:36:23,340 –> 00:36:25,780 Like a cameleon, Bunyan writes, 435 00:36:25,780 –> 00:36:30,699 he changes his color every time he changes his environment. 436 00:36:30,699 –> 00:36:34,179 Pure religion has no place in his heart or his home. 437 00:36:34,179 –> 00:36:37,040 His religion is only in his tongue. 438 00:36:38,020 –> 00:36:40,020 His neighbors say of him 439 00:36:40,959 –> 00:36:44,800 that he is a saint abroad and a devil at home. 440 00:36:47,620 –> 00:36:49,939 His family find it to be so. 441 00:36:51,419 –> 00:36:54,840 At home, he is rude and uncouth 442 00:36:54,840 –> 00:36:59,000 with a temper like a buzz saw and a tongue like a scorpion. 443 00:37:02,719 –> 00:37:05,379 Now we’ve all met Mr. Talkative. 444 00:37:05,739 –> 00:37:09,699 He attends church and he’s one thing. 445 00:37:11,040 –> 00:37:13,260 He goes home and he’s another. 446 00:37:14,239 –> 00:37:16,300 A saint abroad, 447 00:37:17,300 –> 00:37:20,280 a devil at home. 448 00:37:21,399 –> 00:37:26,399 And God is never fooled by Mr. Talkative. 449 00:37:27,699 –> 00:37:30,919 We are to live in such a way 450 00:37:30,919 –> 00:37:35,179 that highly resistant people will come to glorify God 451 00:37:35,179 –> 00:37:39,560 and if we’re to do that we must seek to act redemptively 452 00:37:39,560 –> 00:37:42,280 and to pray effectively. 453 00:37:42,280 –> 00:37:45,320 And that means making very sure 454 00:37:45,320 –> 00:37:48,699 that nothing hinders our prayers. 455 00:37:48,699 –> 00:37:52,620 And that begins at home.